Yeah I put this on hold before. Only because school was in the way and I didnt even have a scanner anymore. Im pretty sure I mentioned this problem a few blogs back. I feel like crap and lost almost all sense of motivation. In other words, I dont feel like drawing or doing anything art related for a good minute. The initial problem is something you might guess on the second try.......money. MONEY MONEY MONEY. 3:<

Its been almost a year since I graduated. And about two months before that count, Ive been doing nothing but freelance jobs. Freelance is a job, a job is something. Even before I graduated my mom has been down my throat about GETTING A JOB. I think thats the only things shes concerned about when it comes to me; what status I will hold in the future. She never really recognized the little things Ive done in the past. The only things I can distinctly remember when she was proud of me was when I graduated highschool and college....and thats it.

I stopped doing freelance back in September and basically moved back to Fayetteville. My brother quit college again so there was no point in living in Raleigh anymore. I took a month off to relax even though I was aware that the retarded ass tuition bill was coming. Ive come to the conclusion that...3D SUCKS! My mom has been more on the hunt for jobs in that field than I could care about and all the feedback shes gotten was "we need technical blah blah blah". Basically NOTHING Ive gotten into college for. And plus, all the freelance jobs Ive taken had NOTHING to do with 3D. Yeah, 3D sucks.

I told my mom that my tires needed to be rotated because it felt weird while driving it. Because of me telling her that, it resulted in her telling me to find a job somewhere out of this state or something along the lines of "going to that college was a mistake". She didnt say that, but thats basically what she said. It stressed me out. It made me cry. I blogged about this two hours ago. It was much more vague and I pretty much told my dreams and aspirations to fuck off.

Ill get back at you when I think life is back in order.

I FINALLY bought some seat covers for the two front seats. So that way all you dirty ass niggahs can stop making my seats more dirty! >:3

I probably didnt mention about this but two weeks ago somebody from my college asked if I wanted to be in an art show that was happening in Fayetteville. Simply bring all your traditional art you want to display and pray that someone would want to buy it. I came with $42.00 worth of digital copies and about seven canvases. I left with $300, the half the things I brought.

I think I was the only person who was actually selling the most. I have about $160 now. Im planning on buying more canvases and maybe a pair of shoes to paint on. The guy said that he might plan art shows once every month seeing as that last one went better than expected. I totally agree with him...and plus the thought of getting about $300 a month is more than fine with me.



In other news thanks to Brian, I have someone else modeling out some people for me. WOOT!

For the most part of Saturday, I spent it at the tattoo shop getting my first tattoo. Im not the type to talk about it fifteen times before it happens so I never let anyone know until the day it was happening. The first people to know about it was Ashley, Jessi, and Mike because they were there with me.

The one to do it on me originally was this bald guy. I was hoping Id get Ken to do it cause I knew him and he was most likely going to knock a few bucks off the price. When we got there, this one lady that I used to party with comes up to us. She hears about me getting my tattoo and goes "nooo get Ken to do it" with this look on her face like shes trying to convince me that the bald guy wasnt anything compared to Ken or something. So I went into the shop to ask the bald guy if I can switch up artists.

Mouse: hey, can I have Ken do this tattoo?
Bald Guy: *glares at me*
Mouse: e .e;; *slowly cowers back*

Ken was almost done with a session he was doing at the time anyway, and plus the bald guy wanted another hour to redo the design I gave him. (added to the fact that we arrived an hour after we shouldve been there) I wanted it on my chest. Two women at the shop, along with Ashley were saying it was going to hurt. I didnt care because the first tattoo was just calling to my chest! It took Ken about four tries to place it in the right position. The session didnt take long and it didnt hurt as bad as I had anticipated. Maybe a few stings here and there but overall it was alright.

By the time we were done with that we went to go get my brother from Nina's house. He had to cut the yard which didnt really look like it needed cutting in the first place. The three of us hadnt eaten anything all day so we made Daniel make fried rice. His rice is more spicey than anything cause he just pops in alot of spicey shit. We spent a good while inside that hot ass house until nightfall.

SATURDAY DAYTIME: bullshit
SATURDAY NIGHT: party


I dont like driving all over town picking/dropping people off. And plus Im getting tired of weed runs. I never ask to want to smoke unless Im really stressed, and anyway people should have their business done beforehand because I really dont like weed runs. Just saying this now before I go on with the next story of this night.

We were all the way on cliffdale and Daniel wanted to get dropped back off at Nina's, which was all the way over in HopeMills. That already got on my nerves. Then after doing that Jessi tells me to go this and that way to get her some money so she can get her weed, and that just annoyed me. I didnt want to do anymore driving after that so I just planned on dropping them off.

I stopped by Walmart to buy some stuff for skittles. Because if I was driving here and there, I might as well do it while drinking so it wouldnt annoy me any further. Ashley had came with me inside and we were waiting at a register. "Im not feelin' this" she says to me...meaning she wasnt feeling my rotten mood at the time. Then out of nowhere some niggah in dark shades pops up behind her tryna mack or something.

Niggah wasnt gonna smash that cause Ashley knew who was already smashin it ((( cough ))), so I didnt pay attention to him half the time and let Ashley deal with it politely. I couldnt understand half the shit he was saying anyway. We came back to the car, got whatever Jessi wanted, then I dropped them off. Weed was not on my mind at all today. Im not a pothead, if anything Im an alcoholic cause all I wanted to do that night was DRANNNNNNNK! ^ __^



Party Roster: Taylor, Justin, Jay, Cammie, her brother, Melissa, Daniel, Jake, JohnCo, Jack, girl with dimple piercings, Ricky, Thea, Griffin, black guy named James, a girl named Lauren I think, Matt, Heather, Ariel, her friend who I didnt catch the name to, Wil, and about four or five people that I dont remember

I was still in a somewhat bad mood so as soon as I walked up on deck I wanted ups on next game. I was drinking as fast as I could before I even made it up the steps. It was me and JohnCo against Ashley and that guy James. Starting around the beginning of the game someone tells Melissa to distract me and JohnCo. So Melissa lifts up her shirt and before you know it the party becomes a shirtless party and everyone was demanded to take their shirts off.

Everytime it was my time to shoot Id see Ashley unbuttoning her pants and Melissa on the side doing that stomach thing she was doing. Id doit in return by making them shoot for my moneyshot. Me and JohnCo. lost anyway. Ive been losing lately what the hell!?!


Someone had said the strobelight was on so I went inside. I saw Melissa dancing her drunken ass off along with four other half naked people grinding up against her. I think around that time, that guy James was having his eyes set on me and Ashley. I wasnt sure but he was everywhere we were for some reason. Ashley comes in saying how she took something that Jake gave her. Im on the side making that Lauren girl swig more of the skittles and thats when I think ashley was drunk.

Lauren: hey mouse can I have another drink of your skittles?
Mouse: yea yea swig that shit!
Ashley: [says something that I didnt hear]
Lauren: *drinks*
Mouse: nonooo keep going keep going!
Ashley: WHY ARENT YOU PAYING ATTENTION TO ME!?
Mouse: O .O;;
*kisskiss moment*
Jake: I fucking love this party

I was playing circle of death with half the people inside the house. Then that James guy came and sat right beside me, it was obvious. I remember nuzzling and he says something pertaining to meeting his girlfriend...or sex....one of those. When I mention things that deal with sex, part of it is true but its mostly bullshit cause Ive been drinking. Me and James were right next to the music which was loud as hell so I leaned in and said something in response to his sex related question.

Mouse: mayyyyne niggah I wouldnt care if you watched, just as long as you were on the side though niggah (in all reality he looks like a sketchy mutha fucka so I basically lied just to make him feel better with whatever game he was trying to throw down)
James: really??
Mouse: IF all you did was watch....then yeah why not
James: well what about your girl?
Mouse: uh iono bout her she probably wouldnt like it
James: you should ask her yo!

I never did ask her cause I never planned to have his dreams happen that night. After a good while of drinking Ashley tells me that JohnCo. wanted to smoke. All day I wasnt even planning to smoke, but I suppose the alcohol begged to differ cause I didnt hesitate to agree to do that in my car. It was me, Ashley, JohnCo, and Cammie's brother in my car. That niggah had came and left, Jay took his spot, and then he spilled JohnCo's weed on the floor of my car.

Time seemed to go by faster after that whole bit and it felt like people kept coming and going at some crazy fast pace. ((EDITED OUT FOR CERTAIN PURPOSES)) I had to edit out this certain bit, but Im going to keep the original version muahaha. And if you read this upcoming dialog right below this paragraph then you can put two and two together and basically know what just went down.

Mouse: oh no oh no if youre going to something doit--
Ashley: (couldnt hold it in anymore)
Mouse: ohhhhNOOO! xDDD

MELISSA KNEW WHAT TO DO, AND HER ASS WAS FINALLY BACK! Shes like the fucking super hero at parties always. Even if she was drinking just as much as everyone else was, if my ass was wasted or if I told her someone else was wasted, she would go into this specific "melissa zone" or whatever you'd like to call it and it would be like she never drank at all cause she would act completely sober if she had to help someone. I told Ashley I was going to get Melissa who was somewhere on the other side of the yard.

Melissa: wooooo! @ w@
Mouse: Melissssssa Ashley is in troubleeee! = w=;;;;
Melissa: WHAT (insert her ripping her top of to expose her superhero constume)

And for a good while me and Melissa were trying to get Ashley to drink water and get out of the car. But Ashley insisted on sitting in that weird as position she was sitting in. She kept saying she was okay now, so thats when Melissa left me to take care of her. Niggah I dont know SHIT when it comes to people being shitface! I just let them throw all that shit up and if theyre conscious enough to talk then ill conversate with them to keep their mind off of throwing up.

Ashley started acting crazy as hell at that point. James kept coming back asking me the same damn question and talking about the same shit. "Did you ask her yet? You gotta meet my girlfriend!" But Id just look at him cause all he had one was his boxers and ONE sock. At that point Ashley was going "Im so HOOD right now!" and doing/saying alot of crazy shit. Thea comes and tells me "take care of her and ill be your best friend" and all this other stuff but Im convinced that was just the alcohol talking.

Me and Melissa dragged Ashley all the way to a shaded part of the grass for her to lie down. Her own little drunken confessions ordeal went down as I was talking to her, having me promise things for her, it was cute! ((( :3 ))) At some point Melissa tells me to bring her back to the car cause Thea didnt like her being out there. Duh cause this niggah still had her shirt off and she was shitfaced, what does THAT say to all the drunk guys out there? So we took her back to my car, and thats when I suppose her hormones were flying more than the alcohol in her system.

James was coming back AGAIN, but this time at the most worst time. (well I guess it was "worst" for him cause he wasnt going to see anything go down.) Ashley was sitting in the passenger's seat facing outside the car and I was leaned up against the doorway right in front of her. She looks up at me in this drunk-as-fuck state of mind with this big ass grin saying "haha, ninja haaaaands ". What else would I say, NO?, I dont think so. Cause no one was even on our side of the yard, cept for some niggahs fuckin on the back and inside of a truck. (I know this cause the windows were fogged up and I saw four legs on top of each other at the back)

James already DONE knew what the fuck was going down at that moment and he goes "ohhhhh shiiiit can I get in the back seat?". Ashley wasnt paying attention she was all drunken talk to JohnCo and doing her ninja hands. I wasnt paying attention either cause I was basically in the zone. I told him to come back in five minutes and thats when JohnCo comes to say goodbye. He wanted a quick goodbye cause I think he knew what was happening too. xD

But Ashley kept talking to him, WITH her fucking ninja hands.....NO let me just not claim them to be ninja hands cause she was making that shit obvious. EYE was making that shit obvious cause I was biting the hell out of a cup trying not to jump into their conversation without letting out some sexual noise. Someone had left the backdoors unlocked and I see James' black ass sneaking in.

James: what yall doin (niggah why you gonna ask THAT when you already know.)
Mouse: (eyes rollin to the back of my head)
James: ohhh shiiiit
Ashley: (still talking JohnCo's head off)


After the whole not-discrete-ninja-hands bit was done thats when everyone started coming over to say goodbye and stuff. I made my way inside and sprawled out on the couch. Lauren and Griffin were chillin on the other couch and Wil was getting knocked out in a chair. Ashley, Jake, and Justin come in to chill. Ashley starts talking about how she hasnt seen Bear in forever and Griffin decides to call her up. And this was 5 in the fucking am.

Griffin: here its calling right now
Bear: .....hello...?
Ashley: Beeeeaaar!
Mouse: BEAR!
Ashley: (insert her drunken talk that seems forever and a day)

And then Bear just hangs up. Id do it too if someone drunk dialed me at five in the morning. At some point people started talking about sleeping and crashing. Jake gets up and goes "I dont know about yall but Im about to claim a bedroom". Me and Ashley looked at that one little girl's room and she tells me to get it before he does. I got it but I didnt wait for anything, I just so chill on that little bed.

Ashley comes in and we were about to make brownies until Justin barges in and tells us that everyone has to leave. So we just sat in my car for a good while. The sun was starting to come up and it was just my car and Justin's car. A few minutes later Ashley tells me that Justin's rollin out. (( brownies! )) it was like that one scene in the movie Crank only there werent any azns around cheering us on. I never was down for going commando but I made an exception that time. >;3


And for the people who just watch me on DA and dont have me on myspace. Im jus sayin now that this is a blog from my myspace. I blog alot, mostly about sex, drugs, and alcohol (obviously) so yeah you should addz me if you havent already. Then you can read the blogs and enjoy my fun adventures if youre bored for fifteen minutes.

[link]
The End

Dear deviant fuck,

You have no idea how intense I make shit when Im left loose to play. You have no idea how I love to fuck people up at parties and watch them stumble over themselves trying to avoid walking over their own vomit. And I dont do it out of mean mischief, I do it cause parties were meant to go down that way. Parties were meant to have two of the main life sources of fun, which is alcohol and weed.

I know what the word "no" means and I know what influences control and dont control me. But seriously if you got a FINE ASS niggah (photographic evidence <3) feenin for you like no fucking other and you feenin for them back, then the limits have to either die down or not exist at all.

But if youre like me, a niggah who is overflowing with charisma and knows how to work it, then theres no need for drugs and alcohol. You have no idea how much of a bad unfluence I can be and how much 'naughty' I can bring in the bedroom. Big things come in little packages and all I gotta say is the secks is going to be twice as good now. ;3

Forreal
Im not even lying.
You do not KNOW its going to be INTENSE.
im going to LOVE IT and my whole back is going to be covered in twice as many scars.
I am going to love it.

Mouse does not settle for less! <3

Im good at bullshitting, procrastinating, and wasting more time. But Im also good at pulling things together at the last minute like NO ONE should do.

I spent most of my time smothering myself in sex, drugs, and alcohol in the past month or two....not like I havent been doing it since forever. Did I regret it? HELL NOOO. Should I have at least done some work in between all three of these things that consist of 90% of my life? Yeah probably.

Does anyone have Adobe After Effects along with a crack? And I still have those cds of Maya and Photoshop but Im illiterate when it comes to reading instructions on how to install. Cause its getting annoying to have to drive to the school EVERY DAMN TIME just to work on something. AND ALSO, does somebody have good notes on rigging? I dont and I need it for a freelance job....or I can just pay a niggah to rig it for me.

"makin brownies" the new mousey lingo for secks